Sticking to the plan

So far I have managed to lose 10bs. I have started exercising as well. Mostly strength and weight training. I am feeling much more energetic than I had been and am getting a lot accomplished.

A much dreaded trip to Puerto Rico is coming up. I wanted to be there for the first anniversary exhibition of MajiLina, but of course after I already made my travel plans, the date was changed. Wasn't meant to be there apparently. I will, however, have time to make a crate and pack up all my paintings and have them shipped back to FL. I keep having this dreaded feeling that somehow I am going to get over there and not be able to make it back home.

On the home front, I have build a large canvas panel to begin new work on. It will be 3ft x 5 ft. Spent the day gessoing to get it ready.I can't wait to start it. I also have another one in the works that is 3 ft. x 4 ft. It feels good to be back on track!!!

{tay'-cho}

Exciting news yesterday. We have been approved for a space in our downtown area that will be the home of my new gallery, {tay'-cho}. Now the work really begins. Must secure some financing to help with startup costs. It would really help if my ex would pay me the equity I own in my old house, but that isn't going to happen.

All week I have been busy writing, revising and checking my business plan. I am so glad I am not in the acct. business anymore. All those numbers just drive me crazy.

Our new gallery will be called {tay'-cho}. It is the phonetic spelling of the spanish word techo, meaning ceiling or roof. We chose that name as it encompasses all that will be under our roof. We have our work cut out for us, but I am always ready for a challange

Transformations

As my life is transforming, so is my art. I am finding myself completely bored with my old work and looking for ways to push it to a level that it has never been. During this past year, it has been very difficult focusing on anything other than just trying to take care of myself, which was probably a huge mistake as my art has always helped me escape my life and go to a place where I am happy. I am feeling the need to work more abstractly as well. focusing on composition, color and rhythm within my work. I don't want to be tied to a subject matter, as I feel that will come later. I have started a series of Mantras that I am feeling compelled to continue with.

A year of many changes

This is a transition year for me. I will turn 50 in 7 months which is a major milestone. I have just come out of a 16 yr marriage where I was lied to, cheated on and manipulated in every way possible. I am not writing this for a pity party, I am writing this as a documentation of my journey to recovery and happiness during this phase of my life. I feel the need to be brutally honest with myself here and anyone who reads this. I could write all this in my own personal journal, but I am hoping that perhaps there are others out here who may be able to identify and relate to my situation.

As proof of my out of control life, my weight has skyrocketed to my all time high. I have taken steps to recapture that control and have realized that I can not tackle my weight issues alone. I have sought help with this part, as I have come to learn in my 49 yrs of life, there is nothing wrong in asking for help.

I believe and strongly feel that I am on the cusp of something great and extraordinary. I just feel it in my bones. I am not sure what is about to happen, but I truly believe I am embarking on something spectacular. This path I am currently on will lead me there.

I have spent the last few months obsessing about my failed marriage and what things I could have done differently. I have finally realized that these were things out of my control since I was manipulated and lied to throughout my marriage. I didn't live the lie, he did, I only lived the consequences. Over the course of the last few months, I have checked phone records, bank accounts and credit reports searching for answers that I was wrong about my marriage. Every shred of information I found, only served to reaffirm my suspicions of betrayal and deception. This was extremely sad, however it is serving to help me realize that I am no longer powerless in my journey and that I can now put that relationship behind me and rid myself of all the toxic relationships in my life that were a part of that history. Today marks the beginning of my new journey.